During our ride home last night Mr. Man and I both reflected on how empty we felt. Just one of the several events of the last week could have emptied anyone's bucket. As we talked about each event and how it unfolded and affected us, we realized that during the week there were several tender mercies that came at just the right moment. A wonderful Skype chat, emails, phone calls, text messages, beautiful plants, numerous hugs, listening ears, yummy cookies, unexpected comments on my blog, helpful reminders to just breathe. Each of these tender mercies arrived at the perfect moment. Even a rainbow appeared as we headed for home. Each added upon the other re-filling our bucket little by little, even in the midst of our sadness. I was even reminded of a favorite quote "beginnings are scary, endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most."
We couldn't have made it through the past week without YOU!
If I kept a daily diary this is what the last week would look like:
Tuesday: Received word that Sadie and Birdie were sick and spending the night at the vet to determine the problem; Wednesday: Sadie dies from ingesting poison; Birdie is touch and go; Thursday: After a blood transfusion, Birdie is back on the mend and can come home; Thursday: Learn a friend's father has passed away; Friday: Nothing thankfully to report; Saturday: Receive the disappointing news that the family get together with Mr. Man's family would not be happening at our home due to a series of unfortunate events; Sunday Morning: Woke up to a sick dog; it's Lola this time. Take a trip to the vet for an emergency visit. Vet doesn't know what is wrong with her; Sunday Afternoon: Went to church and experienced an invisible moment; Monday Morning: Lola still is not better; not worse but not better; need to take her to an eye specialist; Monday Afternoon: Learned that a man I use to work with had passed away; he was just weeks away from this 43rd birthday; Monday Night: Having trouble going to bed...........
First, Decision and Commitment:
Why is it so hard for people to make a commitment or to make the decision to commit? Really, make the decision then move on. Get out on that limb and make the decision. Stop dancing around it. It is your decision and one you have to live with it, I understand that part and I know it is hard but seriously no one is going to hate you for it (and if they do that is their problem not yours)………so be brave and make it. Maybe that’s the problem people can’t live with themselves if they have to make a decision so they spend their life dancing around the “what if.” Quite frankly being unable to commit seems like a much harder way to live; always going around in the circle of uncertainty never knowing what to do…….just circling and circling! Stop the world I want to get off……………….make the decision, make the commitment…….you will thank me for it in the morning!
Second, Common Sense and Common Courtesy:
Really what did happen to common sense? How did we lose it? I’m so curious about its whereabouts and how that “part” of the brain just seems to have vanished. That is sad to me. But then maybe I’m mixing up common sense with common courtesy. You know courtesy……the good manner, politeness, civility “word.” Or another way to say it good manners as opposed to bad manners. Either way I’m coming to the conclusion the two are related and are not as highly regarded as they use to be. That’s more sadness!
That's all for now.........I think I'll go eat ice cream!
I don’t know what it is with me and dogs……….maybe I was one in a former life but my heart just breaks when one goes to Heaven.
In loving memory of Sadie
April 23, 1999 to April 21, 2010
"She was true and faithful to the oath of a dog...loyal and obedient, willing to protect, and eager to please!
Not all dogs live up to that.
When you think of good ol' dog you thing of Sadie."
Saturday morning we loaded the girls in the truck and headed for their home away from home. After watching some t-ball and leaving the girls to run wild and free we headed for South Lake Tahoe. We took the 80 route and cut over at Truckee which took us around the West side of the lake. It has been more years than I care to count since we have been up to the lake. Once seeing the lake a flood of memories came crashing to the forefront of my mind. Growing up camping or just going up to spend the day at Pope Beach was a regular event. Camp Richardson was the camp ground we always stayed at. Apparently now it is considered a Historic Resort. Not sure how I feel about that ………..as I describe a remembrance from my youth that now has the words “historic” in it…………moving on.
When I write emails I like to use punctuation but not in the way it was meant. I love to use long lines of ……………….dots (periods) between sentences or thoughts. For me it makes my email feel more like a conversation. For example I might type something like this:
It was a great loser………..and the chopped………ok that woman was annoying me!
I couldn’t hear it from here………lolol………oh wait yes I can…………no wait that is my dishwasher…..lolol
That’s what happens when you work in your PJ’s……….it is a whole new world. I’m happy to do your laundry…….bring it up………the washer is waiting………I even fold and press………..no, no that’s not me. I fold on occasion because usually Val is the folder…………and pressing only if I must on the day of wearing……..that’s the rule………….well that’s my rule!
I’m not sure if the long line of ………….. is me giving the reader time to envision my express or me envisioning theirs or me pondering their reply. Either way that is what I do and that ….............is why I do it!
I have what I call a magic hundred stash. I keep it around for life's little emergencies or for special occasions or for just whatever, but they are never spent without great thought on my part. The first one came to me as a gift several years ago. It was such a blessing at the time that I stashed it away for that rainy, whatever day. What makes this hundred magic is whenever I spend it, another one comes to me again, sometimes almost immediately. Today, for example, I gave one away in the morning and by the afternoon another was given to me. I know these magic hundreds really aren't magic they are really blessings from heaven.
I recently read a short story entitled "Husband Dreams!" It was a young girl's exchange with a friend on what they dreamed their future husbands would be like. Now, I'm not sure if those dreams have come true or not. But I can't seem to shake the thought of "husband dreams." Last night I told Mr. Man I had to get to bed because I wanted to have a "husband dream"............he rolled his eyes but I smiled. I love Mr. Man because he is my "husband dream." When I say can I have dessert, he says what kind of ice cream do you want. When there is music on in the house he dances with me, even though after 36 years I still can't dance. I love "husband dreams" and I especially love that my dreams have come true in him. Mr. Man, eternity doesn't seem long enough to live out all my "husband dreams" with you!
Recently I had a conversation with a friend about guilt. I shared with her my thoughts on the subject. I said guilt is really just a dark and wasted place and really serves no purpose in a happy and blessed life. I told her that I feel very passionate about the whole idea of guilt and its ability to trap people into thinking things that aren’t true. Guilt does not lift; guilt drags one down and is happy to do so. Guilt is a choice and for me I choose not to have it in my life as I say it serves no purpose! And with that I said, "Amen, I’m done!"